Ask for the details before you spiral
When someone says 'let's talk later', ask for the details now ('I know I'll overthink this — just give me clarity'), because your imagined version can be 50x worse than reality.
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The RSD brain catastrophises in an information vacuum: the absence of content gets filled with the darkest scenario. A concrete technique: when someone drops ‘let’s talk later’, immediately ask for the details now — ‘I have ADHD/rejection sensitivity, I’ll definitely overthink this; can we do two minutes? just tell me what it’s about’.
It works because the actual content removes the vacuum the brain fills with the worst case. It helps to pre-brief your team/partner so they tell you the topic of any pending conversation up front — your imagined version can be 50 times worse than what it really is.
Helps with
Resources & links
1 sourceWhat the research says
Scientific grade verified against the literature. No entries = no direct studies (graded from mechanism/experience).
- Intolerance of Uncertainty Is Associated With Increased Threat Appraisal and Negative Affect Under Ambiguity but Not Uncertaintystudy · 2016
- Experimental Manipulation of Beliefs about Uncertainty: Effects on Interpretive Processing and Access to Threat Schemata (Deschenes, Dugas, Radomsky, Buhr)RCT · 2010
- Intolerance of uncertainty and information-seeking behavior: Experimental manipulation of threat relevancestudy · 2022
- The lived experience of rejection sensitivity in ADHD - a qualitative explorationstudy · 2024